Breastfeeding Post

Exclusively pumping is one of the hardest things as a mom! It is a night/day job and lots of work and stress. Congrats on making it the 4.5months! I pumped for my first and lasted the first 12 weeks, and it was exhausting. It wasn’t until my 3rd boy that I was able to have a child that could latch and nursed well. We lasted 10 months. (Still wasn’t easy the whole time)

Being the most loving and caring mom you can be for Brooke, is the only thing Brooke needs, and she clearly is getting that! :)

Xander had latch issues as well and we used a nipple shield for 4.5 months – which is super long in terms of using a nipple shield. At this point in time he would take a bottle just fine during car rides because he was used to the fake nipple texture. But then once the nipple shield went away he refused to take bottles. Now at 16 months old he still nurses but won’t drink milk out of a cup and never did start to like the bottle again before he was a year. There’s positives and negatives to every feeding situation and knowing that we tried is the most important thing. I’m almost 16 weeks along with my second baby now and hopefully since I’m still breastfeeding this second one will latch better and the nipple shield never gets involved – that said, I’d really like this second baby to like the bottle better than Xander b/c going out for a night here and there would be nice :)

Ohh PS. I still had to pump until my over supply got straightened out. Since X wouldn’t take the pumped milk I donated it all. Also, I’m sure you know CaitlinHTP she was an exclusive pumper like you!

Ohh PPS. Around one year is when they say to get rid of the bottle and switch to the sippy. You can get her used to the sippy now though with water. X lovesssss his water!

I have 3 kids–and I was able breastfeed the first 2 until they weaned themselves (at 9 and 11 months) however with number 3, I only breastfed for a month. He didn’t latch well and was losing weight and I wasn’t able to pump. I don’t respond very well to a pump and won’t get very much…ever. My youngest is now 8 months old and happy and healthy, but I still sometimes feel like I have failed as a mother. It’s hard to feel like you haven’t…but the best advice I was given was that “Good mothers make sure their babies are fed–however that may be.”

Thank you for your honesty! You can only do the best you can for Brooke…and you are!

My kids are older but my experience sounds similiar to yours! Breastfeeding was actually terrible for me though. I know it works out great for some and for some of my friends it was totally that way, but not for me. I got infections and my oldest wouldn’t latch so I was pumping. The infections gave me fevers and at one point I thought it was worse than labor (my husband stronly questioned that thought :) ). I was pumping and got to a point where I was getting less and less and then almost nothing. My first I did it for about 4.5 months my second maybe 4. I did feel really bad about it at first. I finally realized it was making me miserable and that was not helping me be the mom I wanted to be. I kinda just realized it was not that important and dwelling on it would not help anybody. I love what you said about focusing on what you CAN do not what you can’t. That is AWESOME!!!
I have no idea when I started transitioning but I think around 10 months. I am pretty sure right about 1 year I got rid of bottles. I remember letting my daughter pick between two cups at the store and tried to make it fun. I think I had acouple of back up to try in case she didn’t like that one. :)
Have fun with it….new stages are always fun!
Have a great day!

You have to do what works for your family in your own situation….don’t let anyone tell you otherwise-they don’t know! :) Glad you had so much support because it IS hard!

I nursed and pumped (at work) my first daughter till 11 months when she dropped me like a bad habit. Literally one day she just screamed every time I tried to nurse and wanted nothing to do with me. I was broken hearted but pregnant with baby #2 so I consoled myself but thinking about nursing the next one:)

I am nursing and pumping now with 9 month old and while I love it, the pumping is no joke. It is hard work! If I didn’t have to work and could just nurse only it would be a lot easier.

I let her play with a sippy cup now with just a tiny bit of water in it but won’t push the cup much for now. I want to wean her at 12 months so she’ll get her whole milk in her cup then after I transition her from breast milk to cows milk.

That’s what I’m doing but everyone does it differently so do what works for you. If you love your pediatrician they will give you ideas for what might work for you and Ms.Brooke!

PS. I totally love the skirt you are wearing in one of your pictures!!!!

LOVE THIS!!!
I’m currently pumping/ bottling / formulaing my 6 month old, my supply tanked as well after I got shingles on my chest.. yeah. I felt HORRIBLE but see how much happier he is now that we’re both not struggling and crying during each feed. Thanks so much for this!!

I read often but never post. But I felt a need to respond to this.
I HATE BREASTFEEDING. I have no excuses other than it is just not for me. It took me years to accept this because there is so much brouhaha about what everyone thinks is best for your kid. Last I checked, moms not happy, kids not happy.

I am a mom of 3 healthy (mentally/physically/emotionally) kids, one is in their teens.
They were all fed formula from day 1, the last being breast fed for the first 4 weeks.
Breastfeeding is a personal relationship between you and your child/ren. There is a great alternative to breastfeeding and as long as your child is being fed, none-of-my-business. I hate that women feel the need to ask and one up each-other over such a personal experience.

Run on!

My mom couldn’t breastfeed all three of her kids and everything was fine! You shouldn’t feel guilty AT ALL because some women, like my mom, can’t do it from day 1!

Thanks for this post! With my son (now 3 1/2) he never latched on — so I pumped exclusively for 9 months. Pumping is so hard, but I have to admit I felt a lot of times that it was soooooo much more convenient than nursing, especially being a full-time working momma (not to mention those late nights when I was so tired, and my husband would say “babe, I got this, just go back to sleep”….) I felt so many times like such a failure because my son wouldn’t nurse, and I thought that something was wrong with me. I remember my mother -in-law, with nothing but good intentions, asking me why I was pumping the first two weeks of his life and because I was all crazy and hormonal I lost it! I still feel bad about that one… But, my sweet mother told me the same thing as yours, I was doing everything I could, and what mattered most is that my son is healthy and happy.

I think breastfeeding is so hard, and we take it so personally, and for some reason think that everyone is going to be judging us based on what we do, or what we don’t do — but seriously in reality, no one cares! And, if they do, they haven’t had a child of their own yet! :) I can just tell that you are the world’s best mom and doing a fabulous job with Brooke!!!

You did great!

I have 3 kids, I did not breastfeed my oldest (who will be 9 next week). My 5 year old son, I breastfed for 8 weeks, but he also had a poor latch due to a tongue tie. It was a struggle every time, usually we both would end up in tears, and very little milk was transferring- he was still under birthweight at 8 weeks. I had a lot of regret and sadness about it, thinking I should have tried harder or that I should have known or whatever. But your right, focus on what we are doing. I love that.

My 10 month old is still breastfeeding like a champ. When I was pregnant with her, I was determined to make it work. But after the struggle with him, I had a hard time writing my husband on board- finally we agreed I would breastfeed the first week or so until my milk came in and then would exclusively pump so we could measure how much she was getting. Fortunately, she had a fantastic latch from minute 1, We watched her weight closely, and finally when she was 2 months old, we agreed that pumping wasn’t going to be necessary, and so my husband agreed that it was working and I have Been able to fed her at the breast for all but a handful of feedings when I have been on a date with my hubby.

I exclusively BF’d my son for 3 months then when I went back to work, I pumped 7-8x a day for 9.5 months until he was weaned just after his 1st birthday, pumping was the bain of my existence and I hated every minute of it. At the end of the day, the only person who needs to be good with your decisions is YOU. You did what you had to and what was best for your situation, which makes you a wonderful mom!

I exclusively pumped for over 10 months and then I got a nasty sinus infection. I needed to take a prescription that wasnt safe for baby. I was SO relieved that I had an excuse to stop. I could actually eat lunch on my lunch breaks! Also, waking up at 4:30 in the morning to pump before a 20 miler is exhausting
Next kid I am aiming for 4 months tops but if I am too tired or its taking up too much of my time, I will happily stop before then.

I was able to breast feed through 1 months and had enough in our deep freeze to carry over until after Anna’s 1st birthday. I wanted to make it to the one year mark. I came close!

You know, lots of people asked me about running and breast feeding since I run A LOT. It never affected my milk supply. The only thing that was hard was when I had long runs, marathons and ultras. I had to pump right before and immediately after and that was a pain (figuratively and literally!).

With my first, I did the same thing–pumped and bottle fed for 4 months. My supply was low, so I was having to supplement with formula anyway. I was so stressed out about her getting enough to eat when I tried to actually breastfeed. I think that stress made it a lot worse. With my second, my Pedi told me to bottle feed when he got jaundiced and I really got worried. When I pumped and gave him breastmilk he was just kinda “eh” and when I gave him a bottle of formula he sucked it down!! Right then I decided to shut down the factory! Giving myself that permission gave me such relief I was able to enjoy my baby. What a novelty! I think being the best mom possible involves following your instincts and doing what’s best for the baby AND you. We put so much pressure on ourselves–but ultimately my formula fed little man is a super happy and healthy 2 year old :) Thanks for sharing this post. It’s always good to know about shared experiences.

Kudos on making it 4.5 months pumping exclusively! I breastfed both of my girls through their first birthdays, and, as a working mom, spent HOURS hooked up to my pump. While I loved every second nursing my girls, I absolutely hated pumping, especially when I had to travel. Pumping on an airplane or in an airport bathroom is AWFUL! No matter how good your breastpump, it will never be as good/efficient as your baby. Plus, it isn’t able to tell your body when to increase supply like a baby can. Given all of that, it’s really incredible that you were able to continue pumping as long as you did. Way to go! You should be so proud of what you were able to give Brooke!

Breastfeeding really is stressful, isn’t it! I am still breastfeeding my son and he’s ten months but it has been anything but easy. He latched fine and fed fine at first but I went back to work full time after three months and have had to pump three times a day at work and it’s hard! First, it takes a lot of coordination to pump at work and it’s hard with meetings and work load to find time to pump. Plus, pumping makes my milk supply decrease so by the end of the week I don’t have much milk and then I spend all weekend trying to feed him as much as possible so that by Monday my supply is back. So stressful. And I’ve noticed that lack of sleep and work stress really affect supply – so stressful days at work mean I only get a few ounces. I am really hoping to last the next two months until he turns 1 and then I’ll see what happens.

And don’t measure your mom-worth by breastfeeding or night sleeping or any of those other horrible measures people hold you up to. My son still doesn’t sleep through the night and sometimes I feel like such a failure for that – like I am doing something completely wrong. It’s the first thing people ask – is he sleeping through the night – so when I say that he’s not they give me this look and it makes me feel horrible. We do our best and that’s all we can do.

Also, my pediatrician said to transition to sippy cups between 9 and 12 months because the sugar in milk can start rotting their teeth if they use a bottle. My son has no teeth so I guess it’s not a big deal yet, but I still give him water in a sippy cup and he takes that. I think I will start having my sister (his daycare provider) give him some milk feedings in sippy cups soon. We’ll see how it goes. I don’t think he’s too attached to the bottle but I could be mistaken.

Good luck and you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself – you’ll never be the perfect mom (because who is???) but you are the perfect mom for Brooke and that’s what matters.

Janae,
Thank you so much for this post. I loved it reading it as I felt it was very similar to my experience. I had been wondering how you were doing with breastfeeding and I think it is awesome that you were brave enough to post about this.

I, too, exclusively pumped. I also lasted 4.5 months. And, I too felt like a bad mom for stopping when I did. But ultimately, Harrison is happy and healthy and that is all I care about.

I think you seem like the BEST mom and I hope you don’t feel bad for one more second about not breastfeeding for a year. Brooke is an extremely lucky little girl.

This is so beautiful! & SO SO SO TRUE! I hate how hard you were on yourself. I’m just glad you realized how VERY little it matters, and that like you said, it’s about the QUALITY time you spend together. Brooke will remember those times, not if she was breastfed or formula fed. I think 4.5 months is AWESOME & you should be proud of that!!! I don’t know how you did it with strictly pumping- that is HARD work. Thankfully Gabriella did latch easily, but we have the opposite problem- she won’t take a bottle. She LOVES her sippy cup though…but don’t you dare try to put any breast milk in there, she will scream- haha! Crazy little girl!
You are a WONDERFUL Momma, and I just the pictures of Brooke, you can SEE just how VERY happy she is!!! :D Enjoy your time with your Mom!! Love ya!!!

I wish that they would do a large warning on pumps about exclusively pumoing because that is what often happens. You do not get the stimulation from the baby and your body stops producing it. I nursed my kiddos to 20 months and 22 months. They are not geniuses due to it, they lack the asthma and horrible allergies that plague my side of the family, and they do not get sick that often but who knows if they correlate! In anycase I will share this I used a midwife run birthing center, not a hospital, and they provide extreme support for breastfeeding. Basically it is their goal to get you to nurse as long as you can but if you for whatever reason choose formula they never look down on you. I had extreme support with my first and I nearly gave up at month 3 due to her latch issues. I actually gave myself one week and if the pain was still there I was going to use formula. On the last day the pain stopped. But the thing is, it is rare for women to have that kind of support, very rare! I know that had I given birth in a hospital with less support there is no way I would have nursed that long. I know so much about nursing due to their lactation consultant, the midwives, and their breastfeeding group ( they have it online and in person). They call the colostrom, the first thing your baby nurses, their first vaccine. So you gave Brooke that and then some. Not to mention the healthy food you also feed her!! Pumping is awful. I have been there and I hated my pump. So pat yourself on the back.

I think it is hard for women who haven’t been through this situation to understand how heartbreaking it truly is. I went through the same thing with my son. He didn’t latch very well so I pumped for him. I never pumped enough for him so I had to supplement with formula. I did the best I could for 6 months before switching over to the formula full time. It was very sad for me because I felt like I wasn’t doing enough, just like you said. Well, now he is a very happy, super smart 8 year old who adores his mama! Brooke knows you love her! As an FYI, breast feeding went WAY better with my second. She latched on like a champ and took nothing but me for 11 months. Hopefully, if there is a next time for you, you will have an easier experience!

I don’t have kids, so I can’t really talk about breast feeding since I have zero experience. I do have a sister who has twin boys and wanted nothing more than to breast feed them both (whether that meant pumping and giving a bottle or bf’ing) and when her supply wasn’t enough and when it became extremely stressful the boys’ pediatrician turned to her and said, “formula fed babies are getting into Harvard”. In other words, it’ll be okay- you’re a great mom and Brooke is SO loved!!

You have such a good mindset about this! I went through a similar situation, though my milk never came in enough to breastfeed exclusively. She lost so much weight the first two weeks that my doctor highly encouraged me to supplement with formula. I felt so bad about it for so long (I tried the fenugeek, herbal teas, saw a lactation consultant, etc.).

I felt so guilty about it that I continued to pump every 2 hours (that was supposed to increase my flow but never did) and combined formula and breastmilk until she was 9 months, when I finally dried up.

Some people make you feel so bad about it, but my daughter is fine and I’m not sure if I would push myself so much to keep it up if I have a second child and have the same difficulty.

I’m so glad you wrote about this, even though this is a difficult topic. While I was going through this, I had no idea it is such a common problem. I thought I was “weird” and my family (not my husband!) felt like it was my working out and not eating enough and that “everyone can breastfeed if they try hard enough” which was hard to hear again and again. Keep up the great work as a mom! Brooke is perfect!

THANK YOU for this post Janae! I’m 1 month in with breastfeeding–it’s really hard, so I am always googling info about it. I want to try to get to 6 mos and had thought about pumping more often too–mostly to give me a break and Spencer a chance to feed. I appreciate you being so open and honest about your experience!

Re bottles/sippy cups. I started to offer my daughter water in a sippy when she was like 6 months. It took her a long time to get the hang of it, but just before her first birthday she lost all interest in drinking her bottles. No biggie since she was getting most of her nutrients from big people food anyways, but it made the transition to sippies easy. So basically, I think Brooke will tell you when she’s ready. Have you tried the type with straws? My daughter actually had an easier time with those camelback water bottles (you know, the ones with the bite tip), than the traditional sippy, so try a bunch of different kinds. She may just not love whatever you’re offering her. I have invested about a billion dollars trying to find the perfect sippy. I should just send you all of my rejects! ;)

You are awesome to share this! Breastfeeding was THE most stressful part of becoming a mom for me! It was a stress from the beginning. When I had to go back to work I had to pump (in my classroom, where I got walked in on TWICE by MALE teachers…SO EMBARASSING! Who lets themselves into a dim lit, locked classroom?!) I drank water, ate oatmeal, drank Mother’s Milk tea, took Blessed Thistle, and eventually lost it for good around 6 months. I felt so guilty about it because we learned so much about ‘Breast is best’ in our major. But I finally realized that having a non-stressed, happy mommy, that loved J and enjoyed spending time with her was THE most important thing. I will totally try breastfeeding with our next kid and I hope it will go better now that I stay home, but the bottom line is that millions of people were formula fed and turned out just fine without any health ailments! Looking back now, I think J was just like Brooke in that she liked the bottle better and she didn’t try as hard with breastfeeding. Either way, she’s an awesome little toddler now that is doing JUST fine!

Our pediatrician wanted J off her bottle and pacifier by one year, so we dropped the pacifier by about 8 months and bottle around 10 or 11.

Oh Janae, my heart ached reading this because I know how you feel. My baby was BIG and I didn’t have much milk at all (I wasn’t running at all in those days). We did half me/half formula from week one because he was STARVING and little by little, my milk dwindled and dried up. I lasted about four months too.

I also felt so dreadfully guilty and like such a failure. I want to be a good mother better than ANYTHING in the world and I felt like I’d let my little baby down so badly. I felt guilty and defensive every time I told anyone we used formula. I felt judged by others and by myself. I equated being a good mother with breast feeding and I was therefore NOT a good mother.

My boy is now three and a half. He is big, strong, healthy and funny and I promise you I NEVER think about giving him formula any more. With time, I’ve come to learn that being a good mother is NOT about breast milk (although I still totally believe it’s best for the baby). Being a good mother is about loving your child and doing everything you can to the best of your ability. I fail my son every single day and I will never be perfect but he is loved, happy and healthy. He eats well (once they’re weaned, the right food becomes both more important and easier) and he is a joy. I’m not a perfect mother but as you say, I am ENOUGH, I am a good mother.

I hope you are able to make peace with yourself about this. It’s NOT the big deal you think it is at the moment, I promise.

x

Breastfeeding is a sensitive subject; kudos to you for discussing it openly! I breastfed/pumped for each of my kiddos for the first year of their lives, which I was grateful for, but there were a few downsides. Like being pinched a lot. And bitten. (A friend of mine actually had to get stitches after her son, whose little teeth had come in, bit her REALLY hard. Ouchtown: population 1.) And let’s be honest here about the changes to your breasts, of which there are many.

Also, my son had acid reflux and although I tried multiple solutions, he woke up constantly (15-30-45 min of sleep at a time). The first time in his entire life that he slept through the night was 24 hours after I stopped breastfeeding. Truthfully, I would have stopped a lot sooner if I had known we could have gotten precious sleep!! It is what it is; and you are exactly right – no matter what – We Are Enough. :)

You should never feel guilty. One thing I’ve learned being a new mommy is that you have to do what’s right for you and your child. Every baby is different. I’m BF, and my daughter (4 months old) has a dairy allergy. We didn’t know that the first month & 1/2 of her life though, and it was so hard and stressful. She screamed in pain all day, didn’t sleep very much, and she would fuss and fight at the boob. The dr said she was sure it wasn’t a dairy allergy, but I tried cutting dairy out of my diet anyway, and it worked! Two weeks later she was a completely different baby. I thought about switching to formula a number of times before I tried cutting out dairy. It can be pretty difficult because I can’t eat anything with dairy proteins in it. Which is in a lot of foods. But it’s worth it because now she is happy and heathy. Gaining weight like crazy now too. She should grow out of the dairy allergy by her first bday. Oh and my body doesn’t respond to pumping like it does to the baby. I’m lucky to get a few ounces when I pump. Anyway we do what’s best for our babies. Keep on trucking HRG!

You ARE enough! I had the same thing happen to me for #1. And now that I am pregnant with #2, I’ve decided to go straight to bottle feeding because the guilt was SO SO awful for me. I want to just avoid that. Don’t judge me.

I had a ton of milk coming in but my older daughter was constantly projectile vomitting after bfing, so we switched to formula after 2 weeks. Don’t ever feel bad! She was also very attached to her bottle and we transitioned fairly easily to the Nuby sippy cups. My younger daughter I also mainly went straight to formula and both my kids are super healthy and happy!

So I have only been a mom not even three weeks now but I have shared in that failure feeling already. Not with breast feeding but yesterday my baby girl had a tummy ache and there was nothing I could do but hold her as she cried. I felt so bad. But anyway as for breast feeding so far it’s going really well and I am only breast feeding, no pumping. I have a pump and have every intention to pump but for some reason I am nervous to and I am not sure why. I only plan to pump to have my husband feed her at times and if I am unavailable for some reason. I am not going back to work any time soon so I feel like I should be available to feed most of the time. But as I mentioned I seem to be nervous to pump and I don’t know why???

Hi,

First time commenter – found your blog looking for running and pregnancy. This is a timely post for me – I’m nearly 22 weeks pregnant (with a girl!) and starting to plan for breastfeeding. From what I can tell it seems that that there are a variety of factors that go into breastfeeding, some of which you can control and some of which you can’t. As long babies get love and food (whether breast milk or formula) then they turn out healthy and happy – just like your little girl! Thanks for sharing your story :-)

Breastfeeding can be the most difficult thing in the entire world, especially when it makes us feel like we aren’t good enough moms. I think you are an amazing mother and Brooke looks like such a happy, sweet girl! You’re doing everything right! ;)

nursing was definitely a learning curve with my first. we struggled the first few weeks and I was so sore but I was told to just keep hanging in there. I had enough milk but she didn’t suck very well cause she was pretty little or something. but once she got the hang of it we went the distance and continued until 18 months. my son latched on like a champ and continued until about 13 months. of course I was a dork and gave him a bottle after I stopped b/c I kept getting free toddler formulas in the mail and thought that was better than cow milk especially since they were free. pumping = no fun. but we do what we have to do!

You have no idea how much I needed this post today. My twins are just over two weeks old and I don’t have nearly enough milk to feed both of them, let alone one of them. I have been supplementing with formula almost from the beginning because of some jaundice and now when I pump I get almost nothing. I don’t think my milk has come in or it isn’t going to… I’m working with lactation consultants and trying to just go with the flow – literally. But, it’s hard and I feel bad that I can’t give my babies the food I’d like to. I just try to keep in mind that I have two, happy, healthy, growing babies and that’s what’s most important but that’s easy to lose sight of when you spend 25 minutes hooked up to a machine for 1/4 an ounce of milk.

You post really inspired me to make the best of the situation and to really focus on what I can do and am doing with my babies instead of what I wish I could do for them. Thank you!

I only nursed Jack for 2 months and then quit because I hated breastfeeding! Jack latched fine and I made plenty of milk- I was just never comfortable doing it around people (except my mom and husband) so I felt like I either had to be a hermit or constantly be excusing myself for 30 minutes at a time and it just made me anxious and exhausted. I pumped a lot, but felt like I was chained to the breast pump and didn’t like my entire life/schedule revolving around feeding/pumping. I know a lot of people would say this is selfish, and maybe it is, but I felt like when the anxiety that breastfeeding gave me was gone, I was able to be a much better mom and that’s what matters, right? I hate the “bad mommy” stigma that is out there when we stop b-feeding, for whatever reason. I say good for you for lasting as long as you did! You’re an awesome mommy and baby girl is obviously doing just fine! (The $ aspect does suck though- luckily they’re getting old enough that we can give them more real food and less formula. Soon we’ll be done altogether!) XOXOXO

Thank you for this post. My milk never really came in, so breastfeeding didn’t work for us. I’ve been having a hard time remembering a lot of things you wrote about and will refer back to this post on the hard days. “Focus on the things we ARE DOING not the things we aren’t. We are enough.” We are indeed.

Oh I meant to comment on the transition off the bottle. My girls really did not take bottles that often but my good friend is a speech therapist and encouraged me to start with open cups vs sippies and both my girls did well. My 2 year old has a swallowing disorder and we actually have to give her an open cup with very cold liquids to prevent choking ( she only drinks water and the green machine juice!!). Straw cups are better then sippies. Oh and my kiddos rarely drink cows milk, they have never had it just to drink, they get their vitamin d and calcium elsewhere so no stress if she does not care for it! If she loves it, go for it, if she hates it like my girls, no biggy.

You are a great mom! Don’t ever feel bad for stopping breastfeeding. I have 4 children. The first three breastfed no problem. My 4th was a totally different story. I had to switch to formula at 3 weeks and I felt so bad. I felt so guilty. But, you know what? He is turning out just fine! Love is the most important thing we can give our children.

Pumping is freaking hard. I can’t imagine doing it exclusively. I feel very lucky that I’ve been able to breastfeed my kids without (many) issues. I nursed my first 2 for 2+ years and I’m hoping to do the same with my 3rd.

That said… I don’t get the negativity over formula. Yes, there are advantages to BFing but it just doesn’t WORK for some people. I know a few “snobs” and I seriously want to tell them – if doesn’t YOU why do YOU care??? There’s so much damn pressure to be “the best mom.” Bottom line – you LOVE you baby and you would do anything for her. That’s what is important.

I nursed my first for about 4 months and then I was ready to wean him because he nursed only (wouldn’t take bottles), and it was every hour or more! Had I known then that it would be fine to supplement with formula I would have done that to keep him full longer. I didn’t nurse my second one, and we bonded perfectly…it was so much more relaxed during feedings too because there was no pressure to latch on/breast feed. My husband also loved being able to be part of the bottle feeding (even took the night shift!!), and got to bond from the start as well! We all do what works for us and like you said, having a loving and nurturing relationship with our children is so much more important in the long run. We don’t need to beat ourselves up!!!

Oh Janae, I’m so happy you posted on this topic. Truly! You are an example of motherhood, how moms should interact with their babies and focus on what is important. Breastfeeding is by far the hardest part of becoming a mom. I had no idea the struggles we would face and every story as a mom that I read about other moms who struggle, honestly help me past my own mommy guilt. I had a breast reduction in college so being able to BF was a miracle but from day 1 she just wasn’t getting enough. Between the tea, fenugreek, blessed thistle, oatmeal, pumping (baaaah!) it just has never been enough but since we added formula after breastfeeding each time, she’s been a happier baby and I’ve been a happier mommy. So thank you for not only showing realness as a mom (no one is perfect!) but also saying it’s ok to do what is best for your family. It’s a great reminder!

I breastfeed 3 kids, and I am so glad but it was tough. My first I breastfeed her when I was home and when I was at work I would pump and she would get a bottle. With my second, I didn’t work and planned on exclusively pumping, then I got pregnant with #3 and my milk dried up and we put her on formula. #3 was exclusively breast feed and I liked it. I would always pump at the beginning so I had extra, just in case, with all 3. I got my period back after 3 months with each kid so my supply would drop and I took fenugreek and drank a ton of water, it was a lot of work.
When my kids turned 1 year old I immediately put them on a sippy cup. I looked for sippy cups with soft tops similar to a bottle. Once they got the sucking thing down I switched to a less leaky hard top.

Oh dear the breast feeding topic…..ok first I want to tell you are more than enough…you give that cute little girl all your love and that is all that she needs…really…my brother and I were not breastfed not one oz. We both grew up to be giant people..both graduated with honors and both have families so see all good. For me as a mom…that was the worst experience….my first born did not latch. He was tongue tied…it was so hard.. I tried and tried and it was not working…he was losing weight so we had to supplement before month 2. I felt like a huge failure ..worst mom ever….I got really depressed….major Post partum depression…. People around me would pass comments ..mean ones about me no giving my son the best ….and they had no clue why…it was awful… I would not go anywhere…I felt so bad. It took a long time to accept that it was not ,y fault, and that is crazy. People put so much pressure on moms and for some it just does not work …and you know what it is OK. For me it got so bad that before getting pregnant with number 2 I had to promise to not breastfed. That was the one condition from my husband. I agreed. Both my boys are healthy..tall active and very smart in school….I am telling you this only to make you see that it is all ok not to brag…:) sippy cup…I started that late …18 mos I think just gradual…I would offer it and see if they wanted it…they need to figure out how it works…I would let them have it with water or apple juice at first…easier to sip. You are doing great…don’t you forget that…. Brook is so cute but more importantly what I see in the few ( ha ha ) pics…is that she looks happy, you cannot fake that at her age!!!